I’m a worrier, an over thinker, and I find it extremely difficult to say no. Satisfaction is fleeting, only remaining until the next model comes out or a prettier option pops up on Pinterest and if there is a phobia stemming from the fear of being left out, I’m pegged. While these personality traits may have been learned and deeply engrained into who I am, now more than ever, I’m trying to recognize when they inflict and adjust according to what is (I think) a simpler and far more pleasant way to live.
There are a million ways I could spend my free time and Pinterest and Instagram hold a significant corner on that market. For way more time than I am willing to admit, I troll through the newest products, recipes and drool worthy kitchen remodels that adorn the pages of Pinterest while flipping over to see what all my fabulously beautiful and ridiculously interesting ‘friends’ are doing in their perfectly normal lives. As you can imagine, filling my head with this type of stimulation day after day can cause this already anxiety filled girl with a serious case of ‘the grass is always greener on the other side’.
Mr. Roosevelt cut to the heart of it by declaring, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” This is an incredible truth that speaks to my heart so completely. While I won’t be able to attend every party and I will never have the body of a super model (especially after that child I grew in there!), I can rest in and be thankful for all of the immensely beautiful and tangible blessings in my life now. I have the privilege of talking to my mom every day, waking up to the most precious boy every made and I get to sleep next to my best friend each night, even if he does steal the covers. Although my life doesn’t look like the carefully curated boards on Pinterest or the beautifully filtered feeds on Instagram, it’s okay because no one’s really does. We all have dirty dishes, unkempt hair and bad breath in the morning. Most of us have extra weight we would like to lose (so we only post pictures from the shoulders up) and that kitchen remodel just keeps getting pushed back because it’s more important to take the kids to Disneyland then to have that perfect reclaimed barn wood floor you pinned last year. If you really think about it those moments that can not be pinned or instagrammed are the ones that really matter. If I were ever (God-forbid) to lose my husband, I would hate the fact that the blankets never move at night or that I would have no reason, other than good oral hygiene, to brush my teeth in the morning.
So, in an effort to live life simply, enjoying those moments only shared with those partaking in that joy face to face, I will be content there knowing that even if the grass is brown, it’s that grass that means the most and it has the most power experienced in real life, with the real souls around me. This week, cook with your loved ones, make a delicious soup and enjoy it together in that dingy old kitchen and be satisfied.
Some days a quick and wholesome breakfast is essential, for instance, today. I am suffering from what we like to call the common cold. I’m convinced my boss lovingly passed along his germs to me through his violent coughing attacks, during which he refused to cover his mouth. In all fairness, I’m not sure how much that actually prevents the spread of said germs but it makes me feel a whole lot better none the less. Wherever I contracted these tenacious little organisms matters not as the fact of the matter is, I’m at home with tissues piling up around me and I’m worried I might never be found under the ever growing mountain.
After finally rolling out of bed at 11am this morning, I forced myself to bathe. While I was using the shower as a steam treatment, I was pleasantly surprised to have a bit of an appetite. Knowing I can only manage to stand upright for about 15 minutes at a time, I’d have to make breakfast quick if I wanted something more comforting than cinnamon toast crunch. The most creativity I could muster was to take cereal one step further, to the hot variety. Steel cut oats are certainly healthier and offer more sustainability than a sugary cousin. I’m not exactly sure when I’ll be able to pull it together enough to get up off the couch and feed myself again, and sadly my husband is gone all weekend so I’m hoping extreme hunger will be enough to counter act the just-got-run-over-by-a-truck feeling, even if just for a short microwave cycle. (more…)